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Your Favourite Bible Verses

treadmore said:
Genesis 1:11-12 NIV

Then God said, "Let the land produce vegetation: seed-bearing plants and trees on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds." And it was so. The land produced vegetation: plants bearing seed according to their kinds and trees bearing fruit with seed in it according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good.

I use that one against theists who claim weed is a sin. If its so bad, why did god make it and call it good?
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What strange translation is that?

Mine says
11 An Ceiling Cat sayed, DO WANT grass! so tehr wuz seedz An stufs, An fruitzors An vegbatels. An a Corm. It happen.12 An Ceiling Cat sawed that weedz ish good, so, letz there be weedz.13 An so teh threeth day jazzhands.
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http://www.lolcatbible.com/index.php?title=Genesis_1
 
6) His disciples questioned Him and said to Him, "Do you want
us to fast? How shall we pray? Shall we give alms? What diet
shall we observe?"
Jesus said, "Do not tell lies, and do not do what you hate,
for all things are plain in the sight of Heaven. For nothing
hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
without being uncovered."
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I like this because Jesus is basically saying "be yourself."

14) Jesus said to them, "If you fast, you will give rise to sin
for yourselves; and if you pray, you will be condemned; and if
you give alms, you will do harm to your spirits. When you go into
any land and walk about in the districts, if they receive you,
eat what they will set before you, and heal the sick among them.
For what goes into your mouth will not defile you, but that which
issues from your mouth - it is that which will defile you."
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When in Rome, do as the Romans. Just be careful what you say.

3) Jesus said, "If those who lead you say, 'See, the Kingdom is
in the sky,' then the birds of the sky will precede you. If they
say to you, 'It is in the sea,' then the fish will precede you.
Rather, the Kingdom is inside of you, and it is outside of you.
When you come to know yourselves, then you will become known, and
you will realize that it is you who are the sons of the living
Father. But if you will not know yourselves, you dwell in poverty
and it is you who are that poverty."
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I like this one simply because it says we can be happy just knowing ourselves. Heaven isn't a place, it's a state of mind.
 
Titus 1:12 Even one of their own men, a prophet from Crete, has said -- “The people of Crete are all liars, cruel animals, and lazy gluttons.” 13 This is true. [NLT]

It's a miracle the "prophet from Crete" was able to keep a straight face.

:eusa_angel:
 
A few years back, I was in the supermarket with my girlfriend of the time. I saw a bible for sale, and on a whim showed her one of my favorite verses - Genesis 19.

Genesis 19 said:
Lot and His Daughters

30 Lot and his two daughters left Zoar and settled in the mountains, for he was afraid to stay in Zoar. He and his two daughters lived in a cave.
31 One day the older daughter said to the younger, "Our father is old, and there is no man around here to lie with us, as is the custom all over the earth.
32 Let's get our father to drink wine and then lie with him and preserve our family line through our father."
33 That night they got their father to drink wine, and the older daughter went in and lay with him. He was not aware of it when she lay down or when she got up.
34 The next day the older daughter said to the younger, "Last night I lay with my father. Let's get him to drink wine again tonight, and you go in and lie with him so we can preserve our family line through our father." 35 So they got their father to drink wine that night also, and the younger daughter went and lay with him. Again he was not aware of it when she lay down or when she got up.
36 So both of Lot's daughters became pregnant by their father.
37 The older daughter had a son, and she named him Moab; he is the father of the Moabites of today.
38 The younger daughter also had a son, and she named him Ben-Ammi; he is the father of the Ammonites of today.
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She was moderately religious, but still so surprised to see this sort of content in the bible that she called her mother on the spot and read the verses to her over the phone. I couldn't stop laughing - clearly christians don't always read their own book :)
 
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Song of Solomon is a dirty dirty book. No wonder I never saw it in my Children's Bible.

[offtopic]silentknight every time my one-year old sees Obama change into a wolf he says "woof woof". We had to spend about ten minutes watching your avatar :o[/offtopic]
 
I can't say I have any favorite verses in that pile of excrement... Anything good is found more eloquently someplace else (and generally from a timeperiod before the bible).

Ezekiel is always good for a laugh though.
 
I can't remember where it came from but Jesus said somewhere

"For I have heard it said, 'An eye for an eye.' But I have come to change that."
 
John 11: 35

ἐδάκρυσεν ὁ ἰησοῦς

Jesus wept

Pithiest passage. Note that it out piths the Greek passage, which is three words.

English, FTW!!!
 
I'm a big fan of the very first passage,

The following stories are works of fiction in which resemblances to actual persons and places are entirely coincidental.
 
John 2, where Jesus says, "Shut up, mummy, I'm pissed."
 
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My favorite verses

arthwollipot said:
Post your favourite Bible verses here. If you like, you can add an explanation of why you like it.
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Here is five or six of my favorite verses:

John 3:16 "For God so loved the kosmos, that He gave His only begotten
Son (He allowed His Holy Son, the only begotten from the Father to be
allowed to be crucified as a perfect sacrifice for sin), that whosoever
believes in Him (that whoever has FAITH and "trusts God" in Christ's sacrificial
substitutionary death) shall NOT perish (shall not have to be eternally
separated from God because of their sinful condition) but have ever lasting
life (eternal life in heaven thanking and having fellowship with a Savior who
saved them from eternal separation (eternal death)."

Romans 6:23 "For the wages of sin is death (for the logical consequences
of bad choices made in this life time which are cosmically a violation against
God's Holy Nature are eternal separation from Him/God), but the gift of God is
eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord." see verse above.

1 John 1: 7-9 "but if we walk in the light (live in truth and "see" the truth)
as He Himself is in the light (truth)(Jesus said "I am the way, the Truth
and the Life, no one comes unto the Father except by Me in John 14:6),
we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ (His
Perfect Sacrifice on the Cross in place of our imperfection) His Son cleanses
us from all sin. If we confess our sins He is faithful and just to forgive
us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness (to completely
cover all of our sins and forgive them because of the POWER of Christ's
Sacrifice on the Cross)."

John 8:32 "You shall know the TRUTH and the TRUTH shall set you free"
(from the consequences of bad choices and wrongful deeds that you have
done in this life time).

M
 
Deut. 23:1 He that is wounded in the stones, or hath his privy member cut off, shall not enter into the congregation of the Lord.

Jesus hates school prayer:

Matt. 6:5 And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. 6 But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.

Jesus hates oaths:

Matt. 5:34 But I say unto you, Swear not at all; neither by heaven; for it is God's throne: 35 Nor by the earth; for it is his footstool: neither by Jerusalem; for it is the city of the great King. 36 Neither shalt thou swear by thy head, because thou canst not make one hair white or black. 37 But let your communication be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: for whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil.

Ditto:

James 5:12 But above all things, my brethren, swear not, neither by heaven, neither by the earth, neither by any other oath: but let your yea be yea; and your nay, nay; lest ye fall into condemnation.
 
2 Kings Chapter 2 said:
19 Then the men of the city said to Elisha, “Please notice, the situation of this city is pleasant, as my lord sees; but the water is bad, and the ground barren.”
20 And he said, “Bring me a new bowl, and put salt in it.” So they brought it to him. 21 Then he went out to the source of the water, and cast in the salt there, and said, “Thus says the LORD: ‘I have healed this water; from it there shall be no more death or barrenness.’” 22 So the water remains healed to this day, according to the word of Elisha which he spoke.
23 Then he went up from there to Bethel; and as he was going up the road, some youths came from the city and mocked him, and said to him, “Go up, you baldhead! Go up, you baldhead!”
24 So he turned around and looked at them, and pronounced a curse on them in the name of the LORD. And two female bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.
25 Then he went from there to Mount Carmel, and from there he returned to Samaria.
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I must admit that being able to summon bears to maul my oppressors would be fair compensation for going bald at a young age.

I love how casual this is.. heal some water, summon bears to maul kids, check out Mount Carmel and then head back to Samaria.
 
The author of the book “ The harlot by the road side” (or something like that) makes the case that many of, (what would be inane) references to internal organs in the bible are substitutions for genitals.
 
treadmore said:
Genesis 1:11-12 NIV

Then God said, "Let the land produce vegetation: seed-bearing plants and trees on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds." And it was so. The land produced vegetation: plants bearing seed according to their kinds and trees bearing fruit with seed in it according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good.

I use that one against theists who claim weed is a sin. If its so bad, why did god make it and call it good?
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Yeah. It didn't work in the '60s, either.
 
Translation of meaning from the koine Greek, plus I added to the verses

arthwollipot said:
What translation is that? I notice that it also has annotations.
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It's an English translation, probably a little mixture of KJV and New American
Standard or NIV. Since the original is in koine Greek, the only thing that
matters is dynamic equivalence. Those annotations are just adding to the
verses. I accept that I have added to the verses in English.

M
 
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