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VIBE machine

Amazing. Simply amazing.

And their FAQs are a riot:

Other devices that attempt to generate the effects of the Original VIBE Machine are untested and DO NOT produce the same results, nor do they have the hundreds of testimonials that indicate their effectiveness.
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That's all it takes for evidence. Testimonials.

Are there any side effects from using the V.I.B.E?

A true VIBE Machine will have no side effects, but may create a Healing Crisis, otherwise known as a Herxheimer reaction. This will manifest itself as flu-like symptoms for 4-12 hours after a VIBE session. We believe that this is a result of toxins being flushed from the body. We have been told that increasing water intake helps this to be a much gentler experience.
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No side effects! But you may experience a Healing Crisis. Or a Herxhemier reaction. This so reminds me of my Blue Fairies on the Moon FAQs. :D

No side effects, but you may experience flu-like symptoms. So what, exactly, do the words "side effects" mean to them?

The thing weighs 85 pounds! :eek:
 
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85 pounds? Wow!

Oh and thanks to whomever for letting the spoiler tags nest. And thanks for letting us edit thread topics!

Is the device FDA approved?

Data is currently being compiled for investigational clinical research to gain FDA approval.
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By raising the oscillating frequency of every cell in your body, we are increasing the rate at which the immune system operates as well as eliminating the negative toxins that your body is trying to fight off.
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And here was me thinking that raising the oscillating frequency of every cell in your body meant you are warming up.
 
Luke T. said:
Amazing. Simply amazing.

And their FAQs are a riot:

That's all it takes for evidence. Testimonials.
Click to expand...
No, hundreds of testimonials. That's totally different! One testimonial means nothing. Two or three means nothing. But hundreds? That means everything! The only thing better than hundreds of testimonials is one celebrity endorsement. Those things are even better!
 
oh and they have studies that provide proof this thing helps...
from holos university
http://holosuniversity.org/
"MISSION STATEMENT
Holos University Graduate Seminary provides post-graduate education that prepares mature adults to serve as Ordained Ministers, Spiritual Directors, and Spiritual Intuitive Counselors who integrate the healing triad of body, mind, and spirit as their focus for conducting original research and promoting holistic well-being in individuals and communities."

there is an unbiased and respectable source of scientific research...
:D
 
"Every atom in the Universe has a frequency, whether it is a grain of sand, a piece of steel, a plant, animal or an organ in your body - each cell resonates, or vibrates, at a specific frequency or oscillation."

What are they saying here? That grains of sand, pieces of steel, plants, animals and organs are atoms? Or is that sand and steel are made up of cells?

Or could it be a transcript of a sales pitch on some QVC woo show?
 
Filippo Lippi said:
"Every atom in the Universe has a frequency, whether it is a grain of sand, a piece of steel, a plant, animal or an organ in your body - each cell resonates, or vibrates, at a specific frequency or oscillation."

What are they saying here? That grains of sand, pieces of steel, plants, animals and organs are atoms? Or is that sand and steel are made up of cells?

Or could it be a transcript of a sales pitch on some QVC woo show?
Click to expand...

Could be an extremely loose interpretation of string theory...:covereyes
 
Are there any side effects from using the V.I.B.E?

A true VIBE Machine will have no side effects, but may create a Healing Crisis, otherwise known as a Herxheimer reaction. This will manifest itself as flu-like symptoms for 4-12 hours after a VIBE session. We believe that this is a result of toxins being flushed from the body. We have been told that increasing water intake helps this to be a much gentler experience.
Click to expand...

If you buy the machine, everytime you catch a flu will feel like the machine is actually working, because you can "feel the side effects". They are smart, really smart.
 
Why, oh why do they use the word "vibrate" for all this kind of woo?

it doesn't sound pseudoscientific. it sounds STUPID. Resonate is a much better word. oscillate is also pretty stupid sounding for this though.
 
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