Things that god can't do!

T'ai Chi said:
I don't get it. I post my opinion and you go beserk spouting gibberish.
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"berserk".

If you don't find it compelling to read, you must have read it. Ergo, you found it compelling enough to read it.

If you didn't read it, your opinion is unfounded, and hence, the opposite of compelling.
 
There's always stuff like:

make a 4-sided triangle

make a circle whose circumference to diameter ration is 3 (aka "biblical pi")

make the Cubs win another World Series ever again
 
T'ai Chi said:
I don't get it. I post my opinion and you go beserk spouting gibberish.
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Flamanah! Toothpaste monitor hospital car! Flargle nanofactor baxopoly forges! Forthright echo factor mean running two boat legs on a steak knife! Shadow!

That's going beserk and spouting gibberish.

What I did was use irony to point out that you took the time to post to a thread about how uninterested in the thread you were as if it should mean something.

I don't care if you don't find it compelling. There are a great many threads here I don't find compelling. I spend my time reading the ones that I am interested in. If everybody went around posting "I am not interested in this thread" in every thread they weren't interested in, there'd be little else here.
 
tsg said:
Flamanah! Toothpaste monitor hospital car! Flargle nanofactor baxopoly forges! Forthright echo factor mean running two boat legs on a steak knife! Shadow!

That's going beserk and spouting gibberish.
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hehehehe... I'm embarrassed to say I understood what you wrote. However, I will point to you in the future whenever some calls me eccentric ;)


Flamanah! Flargle nanofactor god baxopoly doesn't Toothpaste exist.
 
DangerousBeliefs said:
Look, the Bible is full of both stories and historical truth.

In this case, Genesis is a story about a historical truth... the creation of the Universe.

Are you disputing this truth? Because it's 100% true. Any of your baloney to the contrary is because you don't understand that Genesis is a story.

Also, original sin is true... but Adam and Eve... Eden... well we're back to it being a story.... but a 100% historically true one... at least with regard to original sin.

So, to sum up.... Genesis = 100% historically true... and a story.

So, Genesis is one Bible story we True Christians™ ignore (you stupid Athiests!).

Except original sin, which is true.
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:D :D :D


Nice to hear that the bible is only: "a story". We know; thanks.:)

Sherlock Holmes is a story, with much historical truth. All pray to Dr. Watson! The giver of medicine...:o

What this thread of mine has already shown [scientists are always experimenting] is that an intelligent skeptic always manages to come up with a better trail of thought than your average faither. See JoeThe Juggler for example.:cool:

And as for "are you disputing this truth?".... Jeepers NO, of course not, I'm a good christain boy...la, la, la... :D

I hope you recognise my dissonance here! :p

The only truth is that there IS a Universe...its origin {by goddly creation} is certainly NOT true: yet another thing god can NOT do!:jaw-dropp
 
Maybe to help the closet evolutionists understand {and hence come out of said closet} that EVO is not a random process, ask:" Random = equal likely hood of an outcome (yes?) so the world should be full of every type of living thing coded for by DNA. So where are they?"

Natural Selection is not powerful enough to destroy the multitude of species, alone, the fact is they never were formed! But they could be, dependant on the environment. This is non random. Even the mutation of genes is not strictly random, otherwise no species would be stable!

Is this another thing god can't do...give everybody brains enough to understand EVO?

Griff...
 
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God can't eliminate all the evil people. He even tried it once, sending a great flood and drowning all the bad guys (and presumably lots of good guys too, together with all those innocent children), but it obviously didn't work.
 
God can't:

T'ai Chi said:
I'm not sure I find "here's a list of 'Things X Cannot Do', where X is something I don't believe in", compelling to read.
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2) REPHRASE ANYTHING T'AI CHI SAYS IN A WAY THAT A) CONVEYS T'AI CHI'S ORIGINAL INTENTION and B) MAKES SENSE
 
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Michael C said:
God can't eliminate all the evil people. He even tried it once, sending a great flood and drowning all the bad guys (and presumably lots of good guys too, together with all those innocent children), but it obviously didn't work.
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No no... that's another story with historical truth.

The story is the entire flood, ark, part.... the historical truth is that a regional flood actually happened and scientists discovered it thousands of years after the fact.

But that doesn't stop us True Christians from shoe-horning it in as an obvious historical truth!

(You stupid atheists!)

(And I hope I mispelled something.... you nitpickady athiests!)

(And I just invented a word!)
 
The things that God can't DO 2

what can god not do?

well no one knows...

because... the universe he/she created is so big...

we can not say that he can't do something because he didnt do it here. he might hve done it somewhere else, just not on earth.


Maybe God just isn't doing what we think He/she should do here because... He is too busy doing it somewhere else... or ... something.... hahaha

Just because you can't do it, doesnt mean God can't either...

hummmmm.....
Another thread worthy of THE BUNNY with Pancake on head

We don't need two of essentially the same thread, so I merged the two.
Replying to this modbox in thread will be off topic  Posted By: Lisa Simpson
 
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tsg said:
To be fair, nobody can do that. A) and B) are mutually exclusive.
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Well, I would think that by setting the criterion that GOD can't do it, we are, ipso facto, implying that NO ONE could do it.

I mean, if GOD couldn't resolve A and B (which would be like making a 5-sided triangle or a rock so big he couldn't lift it), and someone else could... they'd be God!

But as I think about it, you're right tsg... If we take the bible literally, there are plenty of things that would make sense to almost anyone but which God can't seem to manage. For instance:

1) Do not kill your children with floods;

2) Do not create a race of beings with free will, and then torture them for using it;

3) Do not put together a handbook that is rife with contradictions, factual errors, and tons & tons of outright crap;

4) now you've gotten me started...

Not that most Christians take the bible that literally. My father--a devout Methodist--sums it up pretty nicely with "I don't think God is going to ask you whether you believe in evolution before letting you into heaven."

On the other hand, for all we know, that's the first thing he'll ask you...
 
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Klaymore said:
Well, I would think that by setting the criterion that GOD can't do it, we are, ipso facto, implying that NO ONE could do it.

I mean, if GOD couldn't resolve A and B (which would be like making a 5-sided triangle or a rock so big he couldn't lift it), and someone else could... they'd be God!
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I guess my point was that A and B were not just really, really hard, but, in fact, impossible.

I used to have a line in my sig: "Far be it from me to let the obvious go unpointed out."

But as I think about it, you're right tsg...
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Purely accidental, I assure you :)
 
Stop abusing me you stupid stoop!

tsg said:
I guess my point was that A and B were not just really, really hard, but, in fact, impossible.

I used to have a line in my sig: "Far be it from me to let the obvious go unpointed out."

Purely accidental, I assure you :)
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Well, I see that you are determined to start an argument. If you are going to fly into a blind rage and begin hurling abusive, incoherent mumbo-jumbo at me, and kill and eat a puppy at the slightest provocation, I am not going to enlighten you ever again (except we know, of course, that I will... over and over).

This thread wasn't interesting to me anyway, and I didn't even read it. A million monkeys typing on a million typewriters for a million years randomly generated my responses, along with the screenplay for "Gigli," and an amusing limerick about a girl from Madras.

Sorry about Gigli, though. I really mean it...
 
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Klaymore said:
Well, I see that you are determined to start an argument. If you are going to fly into a blind rage and begin hurling abusive, incoherent mumbo-jumbo at me, and kill and eat a puppy at the slightest provocation, I am not going to enlighten you ever again (except we know, of course, that I will... over and over).
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Don't make me go berserk and spout gibberish again!

This thread wasn't interesting to me anyway, and I didn't even read it. A million monkeys typing on a million typewriters for a million years randomly generated my responses, along with the screenplay for "Gigli," and an amusing limerick about a girl from Madras.
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[Ah, I see we skipping the traditional usenet "steady escalation of hostilities until someone says 'You're taking this too seriously!'" and going straight to "increasingly emphatic expression of disinterest in the topic". A slight breach of etiquette, but points for style.]

I'm so uninterested in this thread I don't even know it exists! I was re-arranging my sock drawer and my cat crawled on the keyboard. Honest... I ran out of gas. I, I had a flat tire. I didn't have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn't come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locusts. IT WASN'T MY FAULT, I SWEAR TO GOD!111!one!!!!eleven!1

Sorry about Gigli, though. I really mean it...
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Oh, that's alright then.
 
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