The Need for an Afterlife

[NobbyNobbs]

I suddenly understand the need of some people for the belief in an afterlife.

My wife's cousin died a couple months ago. He was 67, but you wouldn't know it by looking at him. Peak of health, manual labor every day, fresh air, exercise, eating healthy. He drank and smoke a bit too much, but no one worried.

Then, one morning, a heart attack. With absolutely no warning, he was gone.

(I should mention, he's more than just my wife's cousin. He was also married to her godmother, and they both became dear friends of ours. I very much enjoyed his company.)

So, every now and then, I get a pang of remorse. Usually it happens at work, since what I do is something he'd be very interested in. I got one of those pangs just now, and realized that his death still doesn't seem real. It seems like he's just gone away for an extended period of time, and I'm sure to see him again eventually.

I know this is not the case, but the feeling is so strong that I can easily see how it would translate into a belief that yes, he has gone somewhere, he still retains consciousness, and I will eventually see him.

I can completely see why people believe in an afterlife. It's a defense mechanism, against grief.

Unfortunately, I choose to remain rational. I say unfortunate, because it leaves me to deal with my grief in a harder way.

But I think that from now on, I may have a little more empathy for some of those who believe in an afterlife.

 

[This Guy]

Sorry for your loss.

I've not read up on what the smart folks have to say about the root reasons for belief in an after life. (That's my disclaimer)

It seems to me that the main reason for such a belief is that it's hard to imagine the death of our consciousness. I think at least the more primitive people, those that came up with the first versions of gods and such, likely felt that that inner being, the thing inside that thinks and talks to us when no one else is around, must be able to survive.

Even though I accept that at some point the electro-chemical reactions that take place inside my skull will cease, it's still somewhat difficult to think that my consciousness will actually go away when I die.

I do agree that it was a comforting thought to believe that my loved ones would be waiting for me in heaven. And I'm sure the idea of an afterlife was at least partly the result of the living thinking that the consciousness of others must live on after the body dies.

Interesting subject.

 

[Autolite]

Unfortunately, I choose to remain rational. I say unfortunate, because it leaves me to deal with my grief in a harder way.

This is something that the woo crowd doesn't understand. It's not easy being a Skeptic/Atheist. Because we acknowledge reality, we sometimes find it harder to cope with life's tragedies. We don't have the luxury of woo belief to help cushion the blow ...

 

[DCSorenson]

Sorry for your loss.

Godbless

 

[Autolite]

Sorry for your loss.

Godbless

DCSorenson, NobbyNobbs claims that he "chose to remain rational". Do you not understand that saying "god bless" to a rational person who has sustained a great personal loss is a rather distasteful insult? I am assuming from the OP that NobbyNobbs knows that there is no god. Please correct me if my assumption was wrong ...

 

[NobbyNobbs]

DCSorenson, NobbyNobbs claims that he "chose to remain rational". Do you not understand that saying "god bless" to a rational person who has sustained a great personal loss is a rather distasteful insult? I am assuming from the OP that NobbyNobbs knows that there is no god. Please correct me if my assumption was wrong ...

Thanks for looking out for me, Autolite, but fortunately, part of my choosing to be rational also includes choosing to be rational about how I interpret things said to me. I suspect that when DC said "Godbless", he was either

a) being sarcastic, or
b) telling me, in the method he is used to, that he sympathizes and hopes I feel better.

Either way, I appreciate it. I'm not the sort of person who gets offended because someone says "Merry Christmas". I try to look past the words and see what it is they mean by them.

If, on the other hand, DC said, "God bless, and I'm sure Jesus is looking after your cousin at this moment" then yes, I'd be offended.

 

[Autolite]

I try to look past the words and see what it is they mean by them.

I thought that the "god bless" seemed like a condescending slight. If DCSorenson was expressing sincere condolences then just saying "sorry for your loss" would have been adequate. I perceived his comment in the same vain as those who say "well Jesus loves you even though you don't believe in him". OTOH, perhaps I might be a little too thin skinned...

 

[Beerina]

So, every now and then, I get a pang of remorse. Usually it happens at work, since what I do is something he'd be very interested in. I got one of those pangs just now, and realized that his death still doesn't seem real. It seems like he's just gone away for an extended period of time, and I'm sure to see him again eventually.

My mom passed away a year and a half ago. Even though we've had my dad over for dinner dozens of times, it still feels like he's just not brought her along for some reason.

 

[Bodhi Dharma Zen]

I would like to add something. We ALL stick to a theory. Thats right, in all truth we know ZERO regarding lots of things and rely on assumptions to keep it "right" to us. Let me present two models:

1) I assume that the consciousness is not the body. I assume that, because of this, its not limited by it. I believe when others say that consciousness (souls if you want) survive the body and are alive in some other (assumed) "reality".

2) I assume that what I call consciousness is generated by the brain. I assume that, because of this, its limited by it. I believe that the experimental data prove that the consciousness is "a part" of the brain, but no more and ergo it cant survive the extinction of the brain functions.

Of course, most of the members of this forum will stick to 2) no matter if they change it a bit here and there. But my point is that BOTH are relying on assumptions to reach their conclusions.

Note that I'm not implying that what we call consciousness can survive the body, but also I reckon that WE SIMPLY DON'T KNOW WHAT CONSCIOUSNESS "IS". There is a strong correlation between brain functions and consciousness, in that way it appears that the brain "causes" it, but we can't simply assume such conclusion.

 

[DCSorenson]

I wasn't trying to disrespect you in anyway, NobbyNobbs. I always say godbless to people who are having problems. I'm sorry if offended you in anyway. Please accept my apology and condolences for you loss.

 

[NobbyNobbs]

I wasn't trying to disrespect you in anyway, NobbyNobbs. I always say godbless to people who are having problems. I'm sorry if offended you in anyway. Please accept my apology and condolences for you loss.

That's the initial assumption I go under when people say that. I figure, most people who would say that aren't consciously trying to insult me, so I interpret it in the manner in which it's intended. Thank you.