Pat Robertson's Dire Predictions!

Sylvia Browne can do better than this:

"If I heard the Lord right about 2006, the coasts of America will be lashed by storms,"
Click to expand...

and

"There well may be something as bad as a tsunami in the Pacific Northwest,"
Click to expand...

just don't cut it. You've got to be bold with the Lord - something specific and unusual. Stand on the Word and speak out the Truth, Brother!
 
Diamond said:
just don't cut it. You've got to be bold with the Lord - something specific and unusual. Stand on the Word and speak out the Truth, Brother!
Click to expand...

In the words of John Edward.. "I'm getting something with a T....Tornado,,,,Tsunami.....Typhoon....Televangelists? We have a televangelist! Televangelists will hit the Pacific Northwest and cause massive widespread yawning"
 
[paranoia] Maybe pat has his eye on a nice little costal property, currently occupied by one of his flock, he could be trying to drive the price down and fleece one of his own. [/paranoia]
 
The Vampire said:
VIRGINIA BEACH, Va. -- The Rev. Pat Robertson says God has told him that storms and possibly a tsunami will hit America's coastline this year.
Click to expand...
Pat Robertson, know thou that I, the Lord God will smite America's coastline this year!

And also with a tsunami!!!

Wait... Okay, maybe a tsunami. I'm not sure about that one.

What do you think? Would that be overdoing the whole "smiting" thing?

Okay, how does this sound? "Storms and possibly a tsunami will hit America's coastline this year!"

Yeah, that's a keeper. Give that to the press.

Oh, and... wait several months before you do it.

Why? Because I said so!!!
 
I think the only thing Robertson could do to entertain us is to stand up and have his adult diaper fall down as he goes around trying to find his LSD. The man's a buffoon, who cares what the hell he thinks.
 
So, no predicted divine retribution against Las Vegas?

Just places with coastlines, like the South?

Kinda makes you wonder what a vengeful God is really vengeful against, dunnit?
 
Beleth said:
So, no predicted divine retribution against Las Vegas?

Just places with coastlines, like the South?

Kinda makes you wonder what a vengeful God is really vengeful against, dunnit?
Click to expand...

Contrary to all the forecast that there may be more storms and hurricanes/tsunamis, I haven't seen any forecast for earthquakes in the Las Vegas area.

However, I did see something on TV where a geologist stated there may be a BIG one in the Yellowstone area. So don't be surprised if god tells him that next ;)

ETA- I just woke up a few Min's ago, still on cup one of the coffee ;) I think it's some major volcanic activity that the geologist says could occur in the Yellowstone area in the near (now to 1000 year frame I think) future. God will likely wait till the details are firmed up a bit to tell Pat (or whoever his spokesman is at the time) that prediction :)
 
Last edited:
Beleth said:
So, no predicted divine retribution against Las Vegas?

Just places with coastlines, like the South?

Kinda makes you wonder what a vengeful God is really vengeful against, dunnit?
Click to expand...

It's all because North Carolina became the last eastcoast state to have a lottery. Blame me! :o
 
It is entirely false to assert that Pat Robertson has the ear of President Bush.

However, Howard Dean is lately a fan of Pat's. Go figure.
 
Abdul Alhazred said:
It's the same scattershot method he uses in "healing" on TV.

"Someone out there is being HEALED!"
Click to expand...

It just goes to show how much he understands exactly what he is doing.

It'd be one thing if he actually thought God speaks to him. Many people do.

But Pat is obviously aware to the contrary and merely qualifies these statements to cover his butt if things don't miraculously happen the way he, I mean, He says.

What a loathesome, disgusting individual.
 
Personally, I'll believe anyone who can leg press 2000 lbs.

Pat Robertson's Age-Defying Shake

Did you know that Pat Robertson, through rigorous training, was able to leg-press 2000 pounds! How does he do it?

Where does Pat find the time and energy to host a daily, national TV show, head a world-wide ministry, develop visionary scholars, while traveling the globe as a statesman?

One of Pat's secrets to keeping his energy high and his vitality soaring is his age-defying protein shake. Pat developed a delicious, refreshing shake, filled with energy-producing nutrients.
Click to expand...
Apparently, the world record (pre-Robertson) was a measley 1335 lbs.

... Dan Kendra of Florida State once set a record by leg pressing 1,335 pounds. The capillaries in his eyes exploded.
Click to expand...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top Bottom