May Stundie Finals

[Travis]

First let's celebrate the winner from April

The snow is melting faster because of daylight savings time. There is the same amount of sunlight, but the extra hour of afternoon sun is warmer than the hour of morning sun. Go back to standard time and the melting will slow down and less flooding. Problem solved.
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Fabulous.

And now the finalists from May!

1) I'm sure they train every Navy SEAL how to do this in the middle of a firefight. Integrating it into the next generation of video games will be more complicated.

Probably they could shoot down the barrel of Bin Laden's gun, rendering it harmless.

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2) This means there is a 50/50 chance that an 85 meter tall lizard is standing over my house right now!

almost zero - indicates that it may be, however small, it may be in existence.

without proof one way or to the contrary of that way, yet the acknowledgement that it may exist is there. I would then have to say it might or it might not exist...that in my books is a 50-50 chance...far from almost zero as monsieur trolle in the form of noconsentforme posts, false and misleading statements.

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3) If only there was a branch of science that could explain these things. And I'm sure the idea of molten hydrogen is in no way stupid.

There are enduring myths in relation to things like fossil fuels and the role of Carbon Dioxide in the atmosphere.
Think about the nonsense that has been perpetrated for a century or more- that Oil is the decayed remains of Dinosaurs and other early inhabitants of the Planet etc
Those old Dinosaurs must have burrowed deep into the ground (thousands of feet ) to become our present day Oils.

It never happened.

The center of the earth is made up of fantastically hot molten fuels, mainly Hydrogen.

Hydrogen is the basis of all combustible substances, including Oil, Petrol, natural Gas, Coal, etc
...
When you see that explanation, you realize that the fossil fuel notion, is pretty laughable, but most scientists accept that notion as a rational explanation for the existence of oil deposits etc.

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4) Yeah, a little conflict in the early 1950's never happened...apparently.

Because it proves my point. America rushing in to poke their nose in any time there is a conflict in a 3rd world country with vast reserves of oil.

Wonder why they never went into North Korea? No oil and a fair fight isn't something they are interested in.

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5) Yes, if only the navy could discover the phenomena of powered flight they might be able to conduct operations away from the confines of their wind powered ships.

Oh sure, it's another lie, plain as day. Check it out. Pakistan is LAND LOCKED! How the **** did the navy get a ship in there?!!? Answer THAT!

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6) I've taken the liberty of highlighting the words that reveal the unsaid answer.

In the memorable movie Towering Inferno, a helicopter rescues some people on the roof of the skyscraper ... the 9 / 11 did not even try. Strange, no? in fiction, an explosive charge under the large water tank solves the problem. There was water in the tanks of the WTC towers? no? and what would be the reason for his absence?

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7) I can see the Hollywood movie now: a mercenary must hunt down a man. Why? Because he has the blood of Osama in him! Directed by Micheal Bay

i really hope he is dead but how many doubles did sadaam have and what about all these transfusions and dialysis stuff he had is it possible to transfer dna by transferring his blood saturating someone elses body over a 10yr period

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8) If planning and funding a murder doesn't mean you are murderer.....what are you? A quasi homicider by proxy?

Also, you are all delusional calling him a mass murderer. It wasn't him that flew the planes into the towers, he didnt literally kill them. He might have planned it, but he technically never killed them.

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9)What does a bird working out mathematics sound like anyways?

was just wandering if any one has heard fake bird songs from lizards cos i know there using this technique to affect peoples dreams the mind focuses on the sound and can there for be tracked (maybe by the moon)it kind of sounds like a bird working out mathematics.....the bird sounds are designed to cause mental pain wile people sleep

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10) Yeah, Google is powerful but I don't think realtime Google maps satellite imagery is quite with us yet. I'm sure CTU will be the first to get that upgrade though.

It may have escaped attention, but all of a sudden - just as events in Syria hotted up - the IAEA decided they had proof that the facility the Israelis attacked really was a nuclear reactor.

When I looked on google earth today, it seems the facility has rebuilt exactly the same

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11) Next thing you know they'll be telling us the women wear veils over their faces and can't drive cars.

If the Bin Laden Lynching Raid at the "mansion" was staged, we need to figure out who the "wife" and kids really were.
Have there been any DNA tests on the kids? Will there be?
Probably not, to keep them in custody and "protect them" from the lime light. So they have a plausible reason for not letting anyone independently verify who they were. We just have to accept their story.
What mother would want herself and her kids to be around:
* the most wanted man on Earth, who was in constant danger of just such an attack?
* What wife would want to sleep with a man twice her age? .
* What wife would want to share him with other wives and sleep with him once a week?

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12) If only those nuclear bombs also doubled as radars that can pick up the stealth helicopters.

There are some conspiracy type questions left. Like, they admit they had a safe house across the street. How long did they have that there? Also how on earth did they fly helicopters into the middle of a nuclear armed country undetected?

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13) He doesn't believe in it but I do. I do so very much.

So you debunked your own claim with your own link. Nice job.

The person who did that proof was trying to obfuscate the issue. He didn't even believe his own argument. The fact that he says it doesn't make it true.

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14) Once we determine the value of "iota" we can better understand this.

Then you will need to consider how the brick go to be above the ground. When you lift if, the Earth will move the other way, and be attracted back when you drop it. And that is called naive oversimplification, as expressed in the example you posted.
Dropped bricks do not move the Earth one iota.

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15) Note: they are talking about the Apollo Hoax and the astronomer in question is Phil Plait

Then you start offering "proof" of your claims by presenting the ramblings of an ASTRONOMER?!

Do you even know what type of professionals to look for when discussing these issues?
Not a person that looks through a freaking telescope.

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16) The introduction of plastic explosives into any situation usually complicates it.......unless you are the Mythbusters.

According to the theory, passengers were allowed to make calls, to get the official story out. Then "At about 10000 feet above sea level, remote controlled plastic explosives blew about 20 windows at once, balanced with 10 each side of the fuselage, so the plane would stay level, and equalize drag. This caused rushes of air to be released simultaneously and evenly, so the fuselage was not significantly damaged. This froze, asphyxiated and incapacitated the crew, passengers, and hijackers into unconsciousness."

I agree with your good point. The air release valve idea is too complicated and slow. Blowing the windows with plastic explosives would be much easier, faster, and effective.

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17) Or...someone moved out of mom's house and never quite figured out how to properly clean things.

I think I may have blogged before about this, in case I have not here it is : mold and fungus are nothing to be trifled with. They may be the single most important biological culture in existence in terms of their impact on human health. Modern life is sickly, smelly, sticky and gamey because of the government's interference in the use of the most ancient technology of them all ... boiling water.

In the 1950's, nearly every single post-war home was rendered far more hygienic by the widespread ubiquitous use of real hot water in washing machines and boilers. I'm not talking about that lukewarm swamp tea you call "hot water" now. You probably don't know any better. You think that stuff is "hot water." The 1950's didn't just seem clean, pressed and white - it was.

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18) And I don't need evidence to know through common sense that it is a Bigfoot sneaking into my house that is stealing my remote control.

We don't need the evidence, but we can guess that through common sense. You can suspect that who (Al Qaeda) is the one with the idea of creating the (Ground Zero) mosque in the first place.

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19) I wonder if the Fake US Treasury is aware of this treachery by the Fed (that's presumably also fake). While thinking about this I think I'll eat some fake food.

Given that most of the U.S. government’s job statistics are fake, and that the U.S. dollar is being counterfeited on a daily basis by the Fed, and that virtually the entire U.S. economy is built on fake “abundance” that’s really just more debt spending… isn’t it is some way actually more authentic to have a President at the helm who faked his birth certificate?

It’s almost like he’s more qualified for the job, you see, running the fake economy with fake dollars while the mainstream media distributes all the fake news. And then in between the fake news bits, the advertisers come on and promote their fake foods, and fake pharmaceuticals which are approved based on faked science approved by FDA regulators who are faking it, too.

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20) Of course. Everyone knows they only collapse in quantities that are non prime numbers in total.

The above is just disinformation. All three buildings went down swiftly and evenly. Damage may occur swiftly but never evenly. And global collapses of huge buildings don't happen in threes. Especially when there had never been a global collapse of huge building without it being a controlled demolition.

There you go folks. The Stundie Finals for May.

 

[TruthersLie]

In honor of cicorp (oh truthienessmakesyounuts or whatever the hell his new name was) being banned for using his own company's name as his username and then threatening the mods/jref for trademark infringement, I think 16 should win.... 16.... go 16

 

[Rolfe]

There's something almost beautiful about 2.

I wonder how he'd do on the Monty Hall problem?

Rolfe.

 

[Travis]

Heh, good point.

 

[brazenlilraisin]

What a bumper crop! I don't know why I always feel I must limit myself to 5 choices (it was very difficult) but I went with 3,4,5,7,9.

 

[DavidS]

Tough call, but I gotta go with the pristine natural talent displayed by (10) over the more deliberately practiced (20).

Similarly, I can't decide whether the artfully wrongful application of wrong geography should entitle (5) to honorable mention of the "double word score" category or disqualification for autodebunkery. Do two wrongs make a right, or does that require three lefts?

 

[TraneWreck]

15 was pretty great.

 

[catsmate]

15, 16 and 17 for sustained, monumental stupidity, though 4, 5 and 10 are almost as good.

 

[332nd]

In honor of cicorp (oh truthienessmakesyounuts or whatever the hell his new name was) being banned for using his own company's name as his username and then threatening the mods/jref for trademark infringement, I think 16 should win.... 16.... go 16

Wait, what?

 

[jaydeehess]

2,5,6,7,17,18

The field was just too good this month.
2 - its barely believeable that anyone is that math challenged.

5,6,7 - as illustrations of supreme stupidity

17 - because the insane always generate top notch stundies.

18 - because I have a fondness for the various 'we don't need no stinkin evidence' proclamations.

 

[NoahFence]

Tough choices! I had to go with the Cicorp/TruthMakesPeace memorial though. #16. Too bad he won't be here to collect his boobie prize. Maybe under a different name?

 

[NoahFence]

In honor of cicorp (oh truthienessmakesyounuts or whatever the hell his new name was) being banned for using his own company's name as his username and then threatening the mods/jref for trademark infringement, I think 16 should win.... 16.... go 16

He got banned for THAT?

Can you stundie a ban?

 

[shandyjan]

Voted!

 

[Horatius]

Wait, what?

Read and weep laugh.


http://www.internationalskeptics.com/forums/showthread.php?postid=7259447#post7259447

He got banned for THAT?

Can you stundie a ban?

I suggest exactly that in the linked thread. I really think we should have a new category: Action Stundies. Awarded for some Act of Incredible Stupidity, as opposed to merely saying something stupid.

Of course, considering how lazy most truther types are, it will be a fairly rare award.

 

[fezzic]

I was going to take #12 because I thought that would explain how four groups of terrorists could hijack 4 aircraft in a nuclear armed country and fly around with no effective opposition by the vaunted USAF before 3 accomplished their missions and 1 could have if not for the actions of the passengers.

OTOH, with #16, I began to think that one things airline pilots do when there is a pressurization failure is descend to 10,000 feet above sea level or thereabouts because the passengers need breathable air. I guess that 10,000 feet idea must have been introduced so the passengers won't experience the terror of an inflight emergency.

 

[Homemade psycho]

So many contenders this month...

2,6,10,11,15,20


2 was just.....I just can't conceive someone saying that and meaning it.

The others were in flat what territory

 

[Oystein]

#2 Takes top honours this month. This is insightful: Quite probably, this reasoning is at the very heart of many truthers' beliefs: That because something is possible, it is at the same time very likely.

#3 Explains the world - but a whole nuther world

#5 I like the little sub-Stundie where Travis accepted the claim that "Pakistan is LAND LOCKED!", when in fact it has a coast line of more than 1000km - more than twice as much as the Netherlands. So I guess the great seafaring nation of Holland is twice as landlocked as Pakistan

#6 Another post that provides insight into many truthers' minds: If reality isn't just like action movies, something must be rotten

#7 Bloody stupid!

#10 Another post that provides insight into many truthers' minds: Everything on the internet is current and factual

#13 Twisting the mind must hurt!

#16 We can make anything up, including physics

 

[Travis]

#2 Takes top honours this month. This is insightful: Quite probably, this reasoning is at the very heart of many truthers' beliefs: That because something is possible, it is at the same time very likely.

#3 Explains the world - but a whole nuther world

#5 I like the little sub-Stundie where Travis accepted the claim that "Pakistan is LAND LOCKED!", when in fact it has a coast line of more than 1000km - more than twice as much as the Netherlands. So I guess the great seafaring nation of Holland is twice as landlocked as Pakistan
#6 Another post that provides insight into many truthers' minds: If reality isn't just like action movies, something must be rotten

#7 Bloody stupid!

#10 Another post that provides insight into many truthers' minds: Everything on the internet is current and factual

#13 Twisting the mind must hurt!

#16 We can make anything up, including physics

I was granting him that he was thinking of Afghanistan (which really is landlocked and is where the operation launched from) and that even then the claim is stupid.

 

[Loss Leader]

Great crop this month. I didn't vote for the birdsong guy, because he appeared to actually be suffering from acute mental illness.

I didn't vote for the landlocked guy because I thought he might have been joking. At least, I hope he was joking.

Digging dinosaurs and hydrogen-powered planet cores for me.

 

[Oystein]

I was granting him that he was thinking of Afghanistan (which really is landlocked and is where the operation launched from) and that even then the claim is stupid.

No worries - that wasn't why that post is stundielicious, and even I, proud of my useless geography memory, wasn't 100% sure whether Pakistan has a substantial coastline and looked it up