Bruce
Philosopher
- Joined
- Jul 26, 2001
- Messages
- 7,519
I hate it. I detest it. It makes me absolutely sick. It's none of your's or anyone else's damn business how much someone donates to a cause. Cripes. You liberals can whine all day about America turning into Jesusland, but when it comes to forking over cash for someone elses plight, you all start sounding like pushy preachers on Sunday morning.
Parody:
A: Gee, things look bad over there in the Indian ocean. Maybe I should donate some money.
[Turns on TV and sees liberal B pleading for donations]
B: You need to give money for those poor flood victims. They need your help. Send your money to us and we'll take care of the problem.
A: Ok. (Writes check for $100)
B: One hundred dollars!!?? Is that all you got? You stingy SOB, sitting there in your heated home, sipping your wine, swimming in your cash.
A: Um, ok. (Writes check for $500)
B: Oh, come on. What do you make? One million a year? Think of the children!
A: Errr. (getting irritated, writes check for $1000)
B: Oh, please! How much do you weigh anyway? I'll bet you could stand to lose a few pound. Don't you know that there are flood victims that haven't eaten for two weeks!?
A: Cripes, how much do you need!?
B: As much as we can get. What is your gross income anyway? Would it kill you to give 10% of your gross income? Seems pretty meager compared to the people that lost everything.
A: First of all, it's none of your damn business what my gross income is. Second of all, how do I know that this money is going toward the flood victoms and not winding up in the hands of third world dictators to buy weapons like the whole Oil for Food thing that you guys gyped me for last time?
B: Oh, you working class slobs are all the same. Giving all kinds of excuses just to stiff the poor. You make me sick. All you think about is yourself. Wait until I get the news crews to point a camera in your face and record your hate mongering comments.
A: Ok, fine. Here's $5000. That's all you're going to get.
Tonight on the news, we hear the story of A, the man who B claims is not only stingy, but only gave money to the flood victims to feel good about himself. What a bastard. I hope A rots in hell. Back to you, Peter.
[Meanwhile, B passes all the money to tsunamivictims.com, a website that claims to be collecting money for the tsunami vicitms, but is actaully a guy named frank that's using it to support his gambling addiction]
Go to hell, liberals.

Parody:
A: Gee, things look bad over there in the Indian ocean. Maybe I should donate some money.
[Turns on TV and sees liberal B pleading for donations]
B: You need to give money for those poor flood victims. They need your help. Send your money to us and we'll take care of the problem.
A: Ok. (Writes check for $100)
B: One hundred dollars!!?? Is that all you got? You stingy SOB, sitting there in your heated home, sipping your wine, swimming in your cash.
A: Um, ok. (Writes check for $500)
B: Oh, come on. What do you make? One million a year? Think of the children!
A: Errr. (getting irritated, writes check for $1000)
B: Oh, please! How much do you weigh anyway? I'll bet you could stand to lose a few pound. Don't you know that there are flood victims that haven't eaten for two weeks!?
A: Cripes, how much do you need!?
B: As much as we can get. What is your gross income anyway? Would it kill you to give 10% of your gross income? Seems pretty meager compared to the people that lost everything.
A: First of all, it's none of your damn business what my gross income is. Second of all, how do I know that this money is going toward the flood victoms and not winding up in the hands of third world dictators to buy weapons like the whole Oil for Food thing that you guys gyped me for last time?
B: Oh, you working class slobs are all the same. Giving all kinds of excuses just to stiff the poor. You make me sick. All you think about is yourself. Wait until I get the news crews to point a camera in your face and record your hate mongering comments.
A: Ok, fine. Here's $5000. That's all you're going to get.
Tonight on the news, we hear the story of A, the man who B claims is not only stingy, but only gave money to the flood victims to feel good about himself. What a bastard. I hope A rots in hell. Back to you, Peter.
[Meanwhile, B passes all the money to tsunamivictims.com, a website that claims to be collecting money for the tsunami vicitms, but is actaully a guy named frank that's using it to support his gambling addiction]
Go to hell, liberals.
