So let's examine how much "trouble" setting up an anonymous Apple Pay account would entail:
Apart from the iCloud account, you need to link a bank account that is in your name to the iCloud account. I don't know about the US but in Australia, to get a bank account you need to provide the same sort of identification that is needed to get a passport. So to get an anonymous bank account, you are talking about some serious fraud (identity theft at the very least).
You don't need to provide fraudulent information to get a bitcoin wallet because you don't have to provide any information. Once again, apples and oranges.
No, those are your words. I only left out the "Its failure may take longer than I predicted, but it will fail, because it is unsafe, unsecure ..." because in spite of you ignoring the rebuttals, that has already been dealt with.