God is a pimp, Mary a hoar and Jesus a busturd? Just a normal family!

[The Grave]

While reading "about Jesus", I thought I'd share this obvious trail of thought and worry about the slagging-off later! After all 'free speech' is KING, is it not? So please don't get all heated up and over react! And if this causes offence, then I think the idea of god per-se causes Me personal offence...2-Shea...

Now, correct me if I'm wrong....

1- god impregnated Mary and used her for IT's own personal purposes of gain...that makes IT a pimp! Not to mention the fact that IT is also a pervert...in that IT is not human (animal) yet indulges ITself in acts of gross indecency with a wo-man....Zoophyle! Beastiality!

2- Mary, for her part, was married to Joseph (the innocent one, of course) and so she was a hoar for going along with IT's plan of child-bearing, to other than her husband.

3- They, IT and Mary both commit adultery!

4- Jesus is therefore illegitimate offspring, being not of married father/mother conception! The marriage vows are null-void so this must have lead to the collapse of their marriage?!

Not to mention their social standing.......

5- The Virgin Birth... { A LIE } I will relate a biological fact to the masses....

A Virgin (god rest her soul) is defined as a girl who has not had her HYMEN broken.....Her what-en? I hear some of you ask?

When a girl has sex, a thin, protective membrane of skin (the HYMEN) is torn away and gives some bleeding. Hence the Cherry!

But! It can grow back if not used! But, there is no need for it to be broken in the first place, either! With care!

Both of these could lead to a medical examination of a pregnant girl rejoicing in the fact that she has never 'known' man!

So the fallacy exposed.....Griff. Thought you should know!

Question:"Can a moral society be raised on immoral/ammoral foundations, such as this?"

Thought I'd better have one...

 

[Gregory]

Gosh, I can't immagine why some theists feel atheists are hostile to them...

Free speech is king, but just because intentionally offensive speech is protected, that doesn't mean your not trying to be offensive.

 

[Darth Rotor]

2- Mary, for her part, was married to Joseph (the innocent one, of course) and so she was a hoar for going along with IT's plan of child-bearing, to other than her husband.

Depending on the scholar you read, Joseph and Mary "married" is not completely agreed. Betrothed, and promised? Yes. Married? The discussions I have read on that seem to be less than 100% sure.

Whore? Was she paid for this heavenly liaison?

Adulteress? Well, if maiden = virgin, and if not wedded to God, and wedded to Joseph or promised to him as a virginal/maiden bride, then adultress seems a more apt charge.

Jesus a bastard? Hmm, hadn't thought of it that way, but if his daddy is God, then I am not so sure it matters. His lineage is still pretty good, eh?

DR

 

[Gregory]

She was promised to Joseph as a virgin (presumably) and that's how she came to him, by Christian theology. Name five major, mainstream Christian scholars who thing God had sex with Mary.

 

[Darth Rotor]

She was promised to Joseph as a virgin (presumably) and that's how she came to him, by Christian theology. Name five major, mainstream Christian scholars who thing God had sex with Mary.

That depends on how you interpret the conception mechanics into your mundane "God had sex with Mary." If the point you are making is that impregnating her with the Holy Spirit is not having sex with her, but something else, then yeah, I see what you mean.

DR

 

[Hokulele]

"I did not have sexual relations with that woman."

 

[Gregory]

That depends on how you interpret the conception mechanics into your mundane "God had sex with Mary." If the point you are making is that impregnating her with the Holy Spirit is not having sex with her, but something else, then yeah, I see what you mean.

DR

That's what I mean. The Abrahamic God isn't Zeus, after all.

 

[Zep]

[spelling_nazi]

"Hoar":

O.E. har "gray, venerable, old," the connecting notion being gray hair, from P.Gmc. *khairaz, from PIE *koi- "to shine." Ger. retains the word as a title of respect, in Herr. Of frost, it is recorded in O.E. (hoar-frost is c.1290), expressing the resemblance of the white feathers of frost to an old man's beard. Used as an attribute of boundary stones in O.E. (probably in ref. to being gray with lichens), hence common in place names.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/hoar

"Busturd" - no such word...unless you mean the droppings left by a wild omnibus.

"Bustard"

Large heavy-bodied chiefly terrestrial game bird capable of powerful swift flight; classified with wading birds but frequents grassy steppes.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/bustard


But I'm rather sure you meant "whore" and "bastard". So we will read them that way.

[/spelling_nazi]

 

[slingblade]

My denomination (AoG, P) taught us to virtually ignore Mary. She didn't matter. She was of no more importance than the paten or chalice of that other church: a vessel. We rarely ever spoke of her or heard her spoken of.

As it was put to me, more than once: "Mary was nothing more than a good girl who happened to be in the right place at the right time. She is of no significance."

Needless to say, being a good girl myself, I rather resented that. And I came to consider the Trinity the world's best-known dysfunctional family.

 

[Gregory]

What's AoG?

It's a rather extreme view, but Jesus did practically disown her in Mark ("But he said to them, who are my mother and my brothers...")

 

[mijopaalmc]

What's AoG?

Assemblies of God, I think.

 

[Solus]

I think you're trying to offend people in the wrong forum...

Go to this forum with the same post: http://www.christianforums.com/

 

[slingblade]

Assemblies of God, I think.

Yeah. Assembly of God, Pentecostal.

The way I say it apparently is a hold-over. They seem to have dropped the Pentecostal part from their official name now, but those I know still in it call themselves Pentecostals, as did I.

 

[The Grave]

Open question - closed answer.

I think you're trying to offend people in the wrong forum...

Go to this forum with the same post: http://www.christianforums.com/

If this is meant for me, I must re-iterate...really there is no intention on my part to offend.

I merely wish to help people think about issues that are much taken for granted, but are in fact, open to question and debate.

And as for hopping sites...isn't that a good way of picking up Trojans. Maybe that's my Internet paranoia.

 

[Darth Rotor]

If this is meant for me, I must re-iterate...really there is no intention on my part to offend.

I merely wish to help people think about issues that are much taken for granted, but are in fact, open to question and debate.

Uh huh, and David Duke merely wants to have open and meaningful dialogue on race in America. Sell that soap somewhere else.

DR

 

[The Grave]

Mary reprieved!

Depending on the scholar you read, Joseph and Mary "married" is not completely agreed. Betrothed, and promised? Yes. Married? The discussions I have read on that seem to be less than 100% sure.

Whore? Was she paid for this heavenly liaison?

Adulteress? Well, if maiden = virgin, and if not wedded to God, and wedded to Joseph or promised to him as a virginal/maiden bride, then adulteress seems a more apt charge.

Jesus a bastard? Hmm, hadn't thought of it that way, but if his daddy is God, then I am not so sure it matters. His lineage is still pretty good, eh?

DR

In terms of the moral message given by the bible regarding god...viz-a-viz "a HE who can impregnate wo-men as and when {in effect rape} IT likes"....And so actually, in terms of Mary getting raped, I guess she's been used, so I retract the slur to her.

And if illegitimacy is o.k. for Jesus, then what of the sanctity of Marriage?

It all breaks down, and as I've pointed out before, it's thanks to 'IT', THAT SHOULD NOT BE NAMED.

I guess heaven is one of those communal camps....eh? I think I'll pass on that place.

Griff...

My use of the term IT is quite defensible and wholly appropriate since IT is neither girl nor boy, animal nor plant!

 

[brodski]

Depending on the scholar you read, Joseph and Mary "married" is not completely agreed. Betrothed, and promised? Yes. Married? The discussions I have read on that seem to be less than 100% sure.

If Joseph and Mary where not married, does this mean that the siblings of Jesus (or perhaps half siblings) mentioned in the bible (Matthew 13:54-58) were bastard children themselves?
I know that the Catholics have had a bit of trouble regarding the siblings of Jesus, as Mary is held to have remained a virgin until death in that tradition- but this is the first time I have heard of arguments over whether Joseph and Mary were even married. Can you suggest any good rereading on this?

 

[The Grave]

Dumb, Dumbest & Dumber! The holy trinity.

What's AoG?

It's a rather extreme view, but Jesus did practically disown her in Mark ("But he said to them, who are my mother and my brothers...")

Well yes, and this is yet another good example of the dumbing-down of real-life by faithers, for the better 'after-life' fallacy.

If they all truly believe it, then why are they still here? Oh, of course - IT tells them to stay, for what? To learn things? So life is yet again dumbed-down to be what prep-school?

Ludicrous.......

Griff...

 

[The Grave]

Deeper than pale!

[spelling_nazi]

"Hoar":
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/hoar

"Busturd" - no such word...unless you mean the droppings left by a wild omnibus.

"Bustard"
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/bustard


But I'm rather sure you meant "whore" and "bastard". So we will read them that way.

[/spelling_nazi]

Hoary....."overused"....."white, with age".....after all, she's not strictly dead!


Bust...."failure" (US)...somebody or something that fails completely!

I've merely noun-ed the informal adverb.

Griff...I hope you didn't loss sleep!

 

[Solus]

And as for hopping sites...isn't that a good way of picking up Trojans. Maybe that's my Internet paranoia.

I don't think you're going to get any viruses over at the christain forums...
Beyond comical if that occurred though; the christain forum sending out trojans!