I Mock Creationists Again

Mojo said:
If He's omnipotent, why did He need even 6 days?

And why did He need a rest afterwards?
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Dunno... I intend to ask him when I meet him. in the mean time, I'm going to delay that meeting for as long as possible by (among other methods) not stressing out over how it was done.

EDIT: Actually, the first thing I'm gonna ask him is if Karen O. really had the hots for me.

EDIT 2: On second thought, I don't think i wanna know that. I don't think heaven would be heaven if I spend eternity beating myself up over that one.
 
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I've got a source that tells me that every creationist walking the earth is a crystal meth addict.

I think my source is right.
 
Hmmm. A sort of "In Praise of Feeling Bad About Creationism".
Not bad. Entirely Adequate, in fact.
 
Mojo said:
If He's omnipotent, why did He need even 6 days?
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Dick Smothers: Tommy, what's the most important element of comed-

Tommy Smothers: TIMING!

And why did He need a rest afterwards?
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Where does it say he needed a rest? Just that he took one. Strictly speaking I don't need chocolate, but I'll darned well take one when I feel like it. =^_^=
 
Thanz said:
Do you ever do anything else? Seems to be quite the chip on your shoulder -- how do you stay upright?
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"Chip on my shoulder"? Quite so. When I was a kid I was bitten by a fish in a barrel. It's left me with a lingering psychological trauma and a need for revenge.

I want closure, damn it.

* sobs *

Either that or I've noticed that stupid lying clowns make good subjects for mockery.
 
Dr Adequate said:
"Chip on my shoulder"? Quite so. When I was a kid I was bitten by a fish in a barrel. It's left me with a lingering psychological trauma and a need for revenge.
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Explains a lot, actually. I bet that if you play video games, you leave them all on the "beginner" level to really rack up the high scores.

I want closure, damn it.

* sobs *
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You've shot this particular fish down to homeopathic levels. I'm not sure how much more closure you can get.

Either that or I've noticed that stupid lying clowns make good subjects for mockery.
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The world is, unfortunately, full of stupid lying clowns. Ever consider finding some new ones?
 
Thanz said:
Explains a lot, actually. I bet that if you play video games, you leave them all on the "beginner" level to really rack up the high scores.
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What are you suggesting? Do you mean that I should try to mock someone who isn't inherently absurd --- for the sake of the challenge?

The world is, unfortunately, full of stupid lying clowns. Ever consider finding some new ones?
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My little poems have mocked psychics, builders of perpetual motion machines, alien abductees, conspiracy theorists, mad mullahs, and overuse of the letter Q.

In this particular case, the joke only works if I mock creationists.
 
Dr Adequate said:
My little poems have mocked psychics, builders of perpetual motion machines, alien abductees, conspiracy theorists, mad mullahs, and overuse of the letter Q.

In this particular case, the joke only works if I mock creationists.
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Is there anywhere some sort of collection of these, as I believe I have only read some of them. Or need I try to find them manually?
 
"Deep in the Heart of Strata"
(with apologizes to both "Deep in the Heart of Texas" and Terry Pratchett)

Those fossils bright
Were made last night!
Deep in the heart of strata
Ammonites
and Trilobites
Deep in the heart of strata!

The light you spy
In the night sky
All came from good old strata!
The black hole bright
Was made last night
Deep in the heart of strata!

Neutrino flux
You bet your bucks
It came from good old strata!
The boson waves
The're all the raves
Right down in good old strata!

The memory great
The love, the hate
It came from good old strata,
The human right
Was made last night
Like all of good old strata!

Duane the Gish,
The horse, the fish
All came from good old strata
The I C R
The well-stocked bar
All came from good old Strata

The sun so bright
Was made last night
Like all of good old strata
We're all new built
Our age atilt
It's all from new old strata!

ooohhhhhhh!

Buuullllllllllll!
 
Thanz said:
The world is, unfortunately, full of stupid lying clowns. Ever consider finding some new ones?
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If you can make them look ridiculous, there's a slim chance it'll lower their ability to get into office.

Of course, we're in the early stages. I dream that some day we'll be able to mock silliness in public without being called sociopathic Commie-Nazis.
 
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