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working on communication

Prefect

New Blood
P
Joined
Aug 17, 2003
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I've found so many fantastic book recommendations in this forum that when I decided to seek out books on communication I thought i'd ask around here before trolling amazon book reviews.

Lately i've become interested in improving my interpersonal communication skills. I'm not exactly sure what i'm looking for. I'm not even sure what prompted me to start looking. Do I want to excel in a relationship with my new sweetheart? Meet new people? Negotiate a raise with my boss? Grow the gift of gab and become the life of the party? Better communicate my sincerity and empathy when interacting with loved ones? Yes, i'd like to be better at all of these things.

I suppose this interest grew out of the realization that i've spent a lot of time practicing talking, writing, and reading, but not very much in listening (or at least in any formal training to learn how to listen). Surely there are a million books out there to learn from? (and just as surely, most of them will be awful.)

As always, any book recommendations are greatly appreciated.

To start, i'm going to reread Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People." I read this book many years ago, and the only thing I strongly remember about it is Dale stressing the importance of smiling. With a few more tools like this (brushing teeth, remembering not to smile while riding a motorcycle) i'll be set!
 
A good candidate may be "The Father Of Spin" by Larry Tye. It's about Edward Bernays, who was the first modern PR man of the 20th century. He was the nephew of Sigmund Freud and used a lot of his uncle's theories in his PR work. It interesting the way he chnaged people's views, likes and dislikes according to the needs of his clients. Today, it's pretty easy to see how he did it, but 70 years ago, this was groundbreaking.

Michael
 
I would recommend looking for a local Toastmasters club. (www.toastmasters.org)
They're a public speaking and leadership organization dedicated to helping people communicate better. You'd write and deliver speeches, and get constructive feedback on what you've done well, and what you need to improve on. It's also a good social outlet, and it'll build your confidence, plus it helps you think on your feet. Yes, I was a member of Toastmasters for 3 years, and did very well. I only left for family obligations. But it helped me think more clearly and organize my thoughts.
 
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