You, the American people, I talk to you today about the best way to avoid another catastrophe and about war, its reasons and its consequences.
America! John Kerry paid me to say this!
And in that regard, I say to you that security is an important pillar of human life, and that free people do not compromise their security.
He asked me to come back from the Amalfi Coast to show you decadent bastards that I am alive and well
Contrary to what [President George W.] Bush says and claims -- that we hate freedom --let him tell us then, "Why did we not attack Sweden?" It is known that those who hate freedom don't have souls with integrity, like the souls of those 19. May the mercy of God be upon them.
Personally, I think 'freedom-shmeedom". Now that I am famous I have chicks and a production deal
We fought with you because we are free, and we don't put up with transgressions. We want to reclaim our nation. As you spoil our security, we will do so to you.
It is good to be the king. I whistle and I can get idiots to blow themselves up. If truth be told, we should be blowing up France, arrogant bastards. You note they just kidnapped Arafat. Well, small loss
I wonder about you. Although we are ushering the fourth year after 9/11, Bush is still exercising confusion and misleading you and not telling you the true reason. Therefore, the motivations are still there for what happened to be repeated.
Am I the only one who notices that beard of his? By the Prophet's nose hairs he is an affront to all men of the Book. In counterpoint look at my beard!! I have actually trained my nose hairs to make my mustache thicker
And I will talk to you about the reason for those events, and I will be honest with you about the moments the decision was made so that you can ponder. And I tell you, God only knows, that we never had the intentions to destroy the towers.
Do ya think I'm sexy? Anyhoo, that tower thing? Sorry. It's probably too late to explain but I really told them "Arches" not "towers".
But after the injustice was so much and we saw transgressions and the coalition between Americans and the Israelis against our people in Palestine and Lebanon, it occurred to my mind that we deal with the towers. And these special events that directly and personally affected me go back to 1982 and what happened when America gave permission for Israel to invade Lebanon. And assistance was given by the American sixth fleet.
You see, McDonald's Burgers give me gas and I determined that, by the Camel like scrotum of the Prophet, I would rid the world of this affront. Atta, and the others, they were you know, really not quite right. Well, how right can someone be who would commit suicide on my say so
During those crucial moments, my mind was thinking about many things that are hard to describe. But they produced a feeling to refuse and reject injustice, and I had determination to punish the transgressors.
So my Arabic is not that hot, neither was theirs. "Arches" became "Towers". Sh!t happens, you know?
And as I was looking at those towers that were destroyed in Lebanon, it occurred to me that we have to punish the transgressor with the same -- and that we had to destroy the towers in America so that they taste what we tasted, and they stop killing our women and children.
But I am well, all things considered. I gotta say, 72 Virgins here and now beats 72 in the hereafter, and I should know. Anyway, you are supposed to think that I am braying some stuff that will get you scared and will make you vote for John.
We found no difficulties in dealing with the Bush administration, because of the similarities of that administration and the regimes in our countries, half of which are run by the military and half of which are run by monarchs. And our experience is vast with them.
He assures me that the commie, left wing press in your country will "translate" in a way beneficial to him. All the same to me. As long as that DNC check clears. 
And those two kinds are full of arrogance and taking money illegally.
If JK wins, he promises me that the next time we get together he will fix me up with J Lo. We'll see
The resemblance started when [former President George H.W.] Bush, the father, visited the area, when some of our own were impressed by America and were hoping that the visits would affect and influence our countries.
God, that Kerry guy is ugly. He makes Arafat look like a Greek God. Have any of you seen him up close?
Then, what happened was that he was impressed by the monarchies and the military regimes, and he was jealous of them staying in power for tens of years, embezzling the public money without any accountability. And he moved the tyranny and suppression of freedom to his own country, and they called it the Patriot Act, under the disguise of fighting terrorism. And Bush, the father, found it good to install his children as governors and leaders.
Gotta go now. The cheap bastards only paid for 15 minutes and the Virgins are awaitin'. Talk about cheap. They sent some burlap from Pier 1 for my backdrop and this cheesy gold thing for me to wear as a robe. It look like Kerry swiped it from a hooker. Some things never change.
