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Stop Alien Abductions

Spindrift

Time Person of the Year, 2006
Spindrift
Joined
Apr 14, 2005
Messages
19,246
Location
Right here!
www.stopabductions.com

How The Thought Screen Helmet Works
The thought screen helmet scrambles telepathic communication between aliens and humans. Aliens cannot immobilize people wearing thought screens nor can they control their minds or communicate with them using their telepathy. When aliens can't communicate or control humans, they do not take them.

A Record of Success
The thought screen helmet has effectively stopped several types of aliens from abducting or controlling humans. Only three failures have been reported since 1998.

Worldwide Use
Adults and children all over America, all over Australia, in Canada, the United Kingdom, India, Austria, Italy, Portugal, and in the Republic of South Africa are wearing thought screen helmets to stop alien abductions. Many former abudctees have been wearing thought screen helmets successfully since 1999.
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I'm pretty sure that after using the helmet no one gets abducted. ;)

What amazes me is that it had three failures!
 
Spindrift said:
www.stopabductions.com

I'm pretty sure that after using the helmet no one gets abducted. ;)

What amazes me is that it had three failures!
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As long as you keep using it! Listen to these glowing testimonials!

“The aliens clearly do not like the helmet.” (This statement is from a woman abductee and her five year old daughter who was also being abducted. The aliens harassed the five year old and threatened her that something terrible would happen to her mother if her mother did not stop wearing the helmet. The girl was so frightened by the aliens that her mother stopped wearing the helmet and they both were taken.)"
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THOSE BASTARDS

It’s been over six months now and NOT ONE INCIDENT! Aside from some of the naive neighborhood kids and their taunting it’s been a blissful period.
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They won't be laughing when a giant grey gets them on the examination table!

:alien012:
 
Stop alien abductions?! What are you? Alien-ists?

But I have a strong feeling that the website is a Poe.
 
I really wish I had thought of this first. I'd happily take the money of anyone willing to buy such a device from me.
 
Craig4 said:
I really wish I had thought of this first. I'd happily take the money of anyone willing to buy such a device from me.
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What a horrible thing to say! Even if you're just joking... wouldn't you want to try and help the person? Lots of people are snapped out of their delusions by a well-spoken skeptic.
 
Captain_Swoop said:
This one is better. and you can make it yourself Aluminum Foil Deflector Beany
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They are absolute rubbish, this is what you need:

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Dn9PVeD8ezA/R46JlBBZjwI/AAAAAAAABE4/yCedOS8NMbQ/s400/deep+sea.jpg

I got abducted once, I was subjected to hours and hours of them rabbiting on and on about their bleedin' holidays... 'and then, last year, we visited here (shows holographic image of two greys smiling into camera with a cheap looking bar in the background) and had a great time, didn't we Xppky. We met a really nice triple who invited us back to their place and.....' It was so boring.
 
Grassy Knowlington said:
They are absolute rubbish, this is what you need:

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Dn9PVeD8ezA/R46JlBBZjwI/AAAAAAAABE4/yCedOS8NMbQ/s400/deep+sea.jpg

I got abducted once, I was subjected to hours and hours of them rabbiting on and on about their bleedin' holidays... 'and then, last year, we visited here (shows holographic image of two greys smiling into camera with a cheap looking bar in the background) and had a great time, didn't we Xppky. We met a really nice triple who invited us back to their place and.....' It was so boring.
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And the secret of a speedy return to Earth (and avoiding all that probe stuff) is to tell them you are a personal friend of David Icke; the look of horror followed by suddenly remembering they've an important appointment the other side of the galaxy is just priceless.
 
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