September Stundie Finals

[Travis]

Well I suppose I've let you all wait long enough. Here they are!


>>>(1)

When "facts" encounter "truth" I side with "truth" because facts often don't tell me what I want to hear.

So I'm going to tell you what the facts are, and the facts are the facts, but then we know the truth. That always overcomes facts.

___________

>>>(2)

But on the flip side how many dinosaur books have led to hundreds of thousands of people being burned alive at the stake?

People will believe what ever they want about evolution or creation , i believe its a flip of the coin brain thought but im a creationist believer , i believe in jesus christ and some people wrote a book called the bible about him . What book have they written about dinosaurs that impact peoples lives on a positive scale .

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>>>(3)

Also, why is that the people who haven't seen fire breathing dragons are the ones that typically think they aren't living in my garage?

What is worrying to me is that it’s always people who haven’t seen UFO’s that don’t believe in them. So it kind of hinges on personal experience. Still it’s bettar than religion, they don’t even have personal experience. Let me check, yes religion is widely accepted in the world. UFO’s not so.

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>>>(4)

Yo, Xerex....what, your name is Xerox? Whatever. This is Barack. I was wondering if you could help me out by installing a virus on all copy machines including the ones your company doesn't make....No, I'm not high....for now....hello?

Make absolutely certain you’re(sic) Xerex (sic) machine in your office is not connected to phone line or internet! During the month of August and Sept (sic) the Xerex (sic) company has conspired to download what they call a "firmware" update to every copy and fax machine in America. The sole purpose of this conspiracy is to make so every machine closely reproduces the exact factors that Sherifs (sic) Posse detected that the birth certificate is fake. They want it so when the case gets to trial that EVERY copy machine will produce layers and background halos and mystery fonts so they can apply Alynskyite ridicule in the Supreme Courtroom. You can prevent this by making sure there is no connection except for the powerline so this "Trojan" firmware cannot be installed by the conspiring parties.

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>>>(5)

Well the one thing it couldn't be is a lot of people just using phones as phones.

Can anyone explain the significance of the phone-in-hand which seems to be happening more and more with each staged event? We saw it in Sandy Hook, Boston and now Kenya.... "Victims" making sure we get a snap shot of them holding their phone.

It may be how they direct their actors in various locations within the set, i.e., via cell phones.

___________

>>>(6)

Oh sure, you just expect me to believe that our maker surrounded the male urine evacuation tube with a gland that is prone to swelling in later life.

I am sure who ever made us gave us an immune system to fight off viruses, why would we need to help it out, was the maker really a knob? Is their a sinister plan to keep us all unhealthy to feed an another entity? plausible?

___________

>>>(7)

Somewhere a joker at NASA is overjoyed to see his e-mail about how people are weightless at the South Pole went over very well. He is perhaps less pleased to see it debunked by someone that thinks gravity is air pressure.

Another giant leap claim by NASA and other so claimed space experts is that earth’s rotation (they claim Earth is spinning at 1000 mph) is what causes gravity. Earth’s gravity has everything to do with the layers of atmospheric water and the pressure they exert downward, not rotation. Remove Earth’s water vapor atmosphere and everyone and everything not firmly attached to the Earth’s surface will be literally flung (remember they claim Earth is rotating at 1000 mph) off it.

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>>>(8)

And in here we have the Dark Matter Engine. We keep the temperature down because we find dark matter works best in the cold.

I do know the NATO can make false radar targets appear in the sky so the enemy can see thousands of planes coming at them but i the sky if you look you don't see anything .Its called gravitons where they can make energy points in the sky that will look like aircraft in size on radar screens .Also they can move these fake aircrafts or these gravitons at aircraft speeds .The gravitons due to the energy they make in the sky where they are will emit infra red as well so deceiving the enemy infra red systems .It works best at night .

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>>>(9)

In conclusion I'm pretty sure my building won't collapse in fire or earthquake because a nice wind hit it the other day and that means it is immune to the influence of gravity.

... if the buildings fell because the planes hit them, they would have fallen immediately, not an hour later. If they fell from gravity, they would have fallen the first time they were hit by a strong wind.

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>>>(10)

So...it is succeeding at waking up people that have failed miserably?

The Ron Paul Revolution has either failed miserably, or is waking people up. I would say it is a little of both,

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>>>(11)

I long advocated against child proofing refrigerators by arguing that the impulse to lock oneself inside an airtight container would later manifest in adult life.

I ran outside and pulled 4 plastic bins ( some are large green and some are grey), inside my house front room, i then went to my car and grabbed rubber from the window screen and because these bins have a pre made groove it slotted onto the top of the bin perfectly and when clamped shut it was then a watertight, airtight and leakproof capsule.

if there is a flood you will float instantly to the top. if there is a chem attack you will be protected.
if you cannot fit into one then join two together and use rubber has a gasket and use nuts and bolts to tighten shut.

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>>>(12)

I would advise, however, against a theory that needs magic to exist.

In the beginning it shows, incantations, spells ? Dont we write words out and call int Spell-ing ? Why is the writing of words using the word spell in it ? Mumbo-jumbo is a funny word, judges use this alot in court cases, saying your mumbo-jumbo wont work. Alot of references to magic here, i dunno about you but to me,occam's razor- The simplest available theory need not be most accurate.

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>>>(13)

A meal consisting of a metal that explodes on contact with air or water? Oh I'm sure that would be an interesting way to die.

how long can you survive on barium meals alone?

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>>>(14)

Hear that Canada and Russia! You may not exist as anything other than an arbitrarily drawn line on a map!

umm, seriously. what "enclosure" seals off the arctic, ensuring that the only water available to make New ice is water that melted from Old Ice? i seem to recall that Nukular Subs used to sail under the polar ice pretty regularly.

in fact the onlt thing that separates the "Arctic Ocean" from the Pacific Ocean, the Atlantic Ocean, the Indian Ocean, The Sea of Japan, and the Bo Hai Sea and in fact EVERY sea not surrounded by land form the rest is ARBITRARILY DRAWN LINES ON A MAP.

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>>>(15)

Well, yes a rocket launch is absurd. It, therefore, definitely had to be an alien spaceship.

So during the Ladee launch (I was unaware of such a launch) I walked out of my house here in NJ to get some papers out of my car somewhere before midnight and happened to look up into the sky and see something. At first I thought it was a meteorite or comet but it looked stranger than that. I thought it may have been a UFO or something crazy. I had no phone or camera on me so I went inside to get one and came out and it was gone. I did some internet searching and found out it was this launch out of Virginia and was visible on the east coast. Now we here all know how absurd rocket launch videos are, but what was it that I saw in the sky that night?

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>>>(16)

Well it is back to bleeding and praying to disemboweled squirrels!

BAN DOCTORS !!! They are more dangerous then any "gun violence".

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>>>(17)

Oh goodness you don't want to be in with the Saps and then cruise on down to the 'Thal territory in your lowrider. Especially since the 'Thals have better guns.

One is a legacy system introduced by organized gang-rape 38,000 years ago. A vestigial brain type which has been steadily vanishing for the past 20,000 years and is being constantly replaced by the Saps brain, which is best summed up as a "brain" that doesn't seem to work. At all.

Sapiens can't live on stolen capital forever. Nobody ever does. It is the problem with people who survive by stealing or raiding the wealth of others, including their genetic wealth. Sooner or later, the best thieves are going back to that mud hut they came from.

The 'Thal brain which is largely responsible for any aspect of civilization which is good or life-affirming, has been outbred by the Saps weakest, craziest members for millennia. It is amazing there are any marginal hybrid 'Thals left ... but this tells you that these genes must have been very, very special to persist for so long despite their dwindling share of the chromosomal pool.

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>>>(18)

Man, I can only imagine what the hazard pay would be for someone working on liquid fueled rockets inside a pressurized assembly chamber only reachable by Sherpas.

You know, I was thinking recently -- instead of having launch pads by the ocean at sea level, wouldn't it make more sense to build them on top of mountains? They'd have up to a 5½ mile head start without burning an ounce of fuel! I mean, Everest is 29,000 feet high. They wouldn't even need those aircraft assisted launches like this.

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>>>(19)

Resistance to Borg gut flora is futile!

Why not the 100 trillion bacteria living in symbiosis with us on and in our bodies?
These 10 000 species contain 360 times more genes than us.
How could they not be influencing our emotions? It's in their interest to manipulate our behavior.

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>>>(20)

Yeah, well I won't even tell you all what telepathy told me about people who use telepathy to figure out what Herod Antipas was screwing!

Yes, but then sometimes historical records are corrupted or are incomplete, for whatever reasons. My main example is the life of Jesus. He grew up in the house of Herod Antipas and his wife Herodias, yet how little written records are there of that couple? What I have learned of them by telepathy, is that they were a couple of sexual perverts using dogs, among other things...

___________

So there you are. Nineteen stundies from September and one from August. Just because I'm weird that way.

And here is the winner from the August poll:

If you think that noticing the number of people in the US has gone up from 40 years ago is proof that there is no depopulation agenda, then you are an idiot.

 

[grmcdorman]

Bumper crop this month.

 

[thedopefishlives]

NUmber 1 is basically a two-sentence synopsis of everything that is conspiracy theory. If a person can't see what is so horribly broken about those sentences, they're probably a CTer.

 

[FenerFan]

A great group of Stundies...so much stupid in one place might tip the entire forum over. I went with number 1.

 

[fezzic]

I took #1 though #18 was kind of interesting to my simple mind.

However many a great concept has fallen apart when the designers and contractors look at the Request for Proposals and go, "you gotta be kidding... this is a joke, right?"

 

[jaydeehess]

Difficult choice this month. All are very deserving of honour in this fashion. I chose 1,4,5,&18 but am second guessing myself already

 

[Bishop]

NUmber 1 is basically a two-sentence synopsis of everything that is conspiracy theory. If a person can't see what is so horribly broken about those sentences, they're probably a CTer.

Interestingly enough, the person who said that wasn't exactly a conspiracy theorist per se, but a religious nut.

 

[Spindrift]

Number 1 is a near perfect Stundie and I see it's has a sizeable lead already.

 

[Travis]

Interestingly enough, the person who said that wasn't exactly a conspiracy theorist per se, but a religious nut.

Often they have a lot in common.

 

[jadebox]

Maybe it's just because it's out of context, but (15) sounds to me like it is making fun of those who see a light in the sky and decide that it must be an alien spaceship.

-- Roger

 

[Myron Proudfoot]

the first one is just so PERFECT. wow

 

[Horatius]

Maybe it's just because it's out of context, but (15) sounds to me like it is making fun of those who see a light in the sky and decide that it must be an alien spaceship.

-- Roger

It's often difficult to tell, but that one came from a forum noted for its level of idiocy and insanity. One of them trying to reconcile the evidence of his senses with their preconceived notions of how the world "really works", and still rejecting reality, is pretty much what we've come to expect from them.

 

[Travis]

Yeah, it was from a thread explicitly about how rockets can't actually work as I recall.

 

[TheRedWorm]

Often they have a lot in common.

Magical thinking?

ETA: #1 on the list, #1 in my heart.

 

[FenerFan]

If #1 wins are we allowed to send an e-mail to Terri Copeland Pearsons and the Eagle Mountain church to congratulate her? We could send her a link to the Vaccine-Autism thread in the hope that she might educate herself on the matter.

 

[Bishop]

If #1 wins are we allowed to send an e-mail to Terri Copeland Pearsons and the Eagle Mountain church to congratulate her? We could send her a link to the Vaccine-Autism thread in the hope that she might educate herself on the matter.

She doesn't need education, she knows the truth!

 

[8den]

I have two nominees this month. But I never win, apparently some people have access to people who are far far stupider than me. I almost envy them. Almost.

 

[Brainster]

#1 is pithier, but the Xerex one, that's major whack.

 

[jadebox]

Yeah, it was from a thread explicitly about how rockets can't actually work as I recall.

Thanks. I have a special fondness for those "rockets don't work" threads. (See my avatar.)

-- Roger

 

[Alferd_Packer]

#1 is pithier, but the Xerex one, that's major whack.

That one almost sounds like a joke post.