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"Christ"mas Dinner

Fritzdorf

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Sep 15, 2006
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As is usual at this time of year, a sports club that I am a member of is organising its annual Christmas dinner.

I am happy to celebrate Xmas, as being a public holiday and a special time to spend with the family, but can't be doing with any of this birth of Jesus stuff. That's the same approach that almost everyone I know takes.

However, someone on the sports club committee likes to start the Christmas dinner by getting everyone to stand up and pray. I want to object to this, but don't know the best way to do this politely and effectively. I would love to be impolite, but don't want to be seen as a trouble-maker by my friends in the club who do not object so strongly.

Ideas?


Fritzdorf.
 
Fritzdorf said:
As is usual at this time of year, a sports club that I am a member of is organising its annual Christmas dinner.

I am happy to celebrate Xmas, as being a public holiday and a special time to spend with the family, but can't be doing with any of this birth of Jesus stuff. That's the same approach that almost everyone I know takes.

However, someone on the sports club committee likes to start the Christmas dinner by getting everyone to stand up and pray. I want to object to this, but don't know the best way to do this politely and effectively. I would love to be impolite, but don't want to be seen as a trouble-maker by my friends in the club who do not object so strongly.

Ideas?


Fritzdorf.
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You might volunteer to lead the prayer, then give some sort of secular sort of thanks and well wishes. I can't promise you that nobody would be offended, but it's hard to be too offended by someone wishing you happiness.
 
Happy B-Day, Tricky.

Tricky's idea is good. "Let's all have a wonderful holiday and a great new year. Let's eat!"


If I were in that situation - I would probably stand up and keep my eyes open - looking around - sipping on a drink - and then when they were done - I would sit down and continue with the fun. Causing any kind of scene is not worth the 'pain' it would invoke.
 
I am going through this right now with my family. I have told them that I am an atheist.
Last time they visited me we had dinner at my house. My dad asked me to lead the prayer since it was my house. I did. I dont remember what I said exactly but it was along the lines of.

" Thank you all for coming to visit. It is good to see my family. Lets enjoy the food and company tonight."

Nothing to do with thanking Jesus or God.

When I am at a place where a prayer is said I just sit there quietly. I kind of think about it like raising kids. You have to pick you battles when raising kids. Same thing when dealing with religious people. Some things are just not worth battling about.
 
When my dad comes over, we ask him to lead the prayer. I wonder if he isn't doing it because he thinks we believe. He once told me he thought when we died, we died, that was it.

In any case, for the question raised, I would just stand politely, but not join in with the actual prayer.
 
Good suggestions, but I think maybe Fritz is asking how to address the topic ahead of time. It doesn't sound like he'll be the one called on at the event.

I do think it's more honest to object to a prayer--maybe by pointing out that it would be insensitive to all non-Christians who might be present--than to volunteer to do a "prayer" and then offer secular well-wishes.
 
If they reply that the mere fact that it's a Christmas dinner implies that everyone present is a Christian, ask them whether using the word "Thursday" suggests that they are devotees of Thor, or Odin for "Wednesday", or Saturn for "Saturday", or Julius Caesar for "July", or Janus for "January", or Caesar Augustus for "August". . . .
 
Fritzdorf said:
As is usual at this time of year, a sports club that I am a member of is organising its annual Christmas dinner.

I am happy to celebrate Xmas, as being a public holiday and a special time to spend with the family, but can't be doing with any of this birth of Jesus stuff. That's the same approach that almost everyone I know takes.

However, someone on the sports club committee likes to start the Christmas dinner by getting everyone to stand up and pray. I want to object to this, but don't know the best way to do this politely and effectively. I would love to be impolite, but don't want to be seen as a trouble-maker by my friends in the club who do not object so strongly.

Ideas?


Fritzdorf.
Click to expand...

http://www.internationalskeptics.com/forums/showthread.php?t=90341

You may be interested in this thread, on a related matter. My view would be to speak to someone else on the committee, make the point that it is not reasonable to expect others to participate in a religious observance and suggest that they speak to the member who wishes to do this.
 
I would stand silently until they finish, then eat.

What I hate is when they wait to start praying until you've already put food in your mouth, so you have a choice of rudely chewing while they pray, or standing there with your mouth full for five minutes.
 
JoeTheJuggler said:
If they reply that the mere fact that it's a Christmas dinner implies that everyone present is a Christian, ask them whether using the word "Thursday" suggests that they are devotees of Thor, or Odin for "Wednesday", or Saturn for "Saturday", or Julius Caesar for "July", or Janus for "January", or Caesar Augustus for "August". . . .
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If you want an argument go for this- even better depending on waht day of the week the meal is held on, demand a sacrifice for the pagen deity after which eth day is named.

Madalch said:
I would stand silently until they finish, then eat.

What I hate is when they wait to start praying until you've already put food in your mouth, so you have a choice of rudely chewing while they pray, or standing there with your mouth full for five minutes.
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This woudl be my chocie if I was after a quiet life. there is no shame in quietly letting others get on with their religion, even fi ethy are trying to force it on you. It's meaningless ritual, why turn a social situation into a fight?

tkingdoll said:
While everyone has their eyes closed in prayer, hide the turkey.
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Actually, scratch that, teek has by far the bestest idea :D
 
I am facing a similar situation with a couple of professional organizations I belong to. They usually begin with a prayer. In one organization, I can usually put up with it. But the other one, the members all read (or recite from memory) this opening prayer at the beginning of the meeting, and a closing one at the end. I am so offended, that I just quit attending meetings, and I haven't told anyone why. They haven't asked. I am very tempted to say something, but just haven't yet. Surely I can't be the only member who is bothered by all this? Oh, wait...I live in Texas...so maybe I am. :(
 
Fritzdorf,

My view would be to just stand there. It's only once a years.
 
I am in situations where people pray but it's appropriate (like me doing a show at a church or me attending a religious wedding--and that's fine, as long as they don't expect me to participate in parying, which has never happened).

This doesn't sound like an appropriate situation. If the sports club has no religious affiliation, it's wrong for someone to assume it's OK to pray just because it's a "Christmas" dinner.

I think the "just stand there and be quiet" response would be OK if you didn't know about this ahead of time. I don't think Fritzdorf or anyone else is seriously considering disrupting the prayer in progress, or making a case about it during the dinner. (Though I'd probably want to speak with the organizers about it afterward, if I were blindsided like that.)

ETA: But what do I know? I still think it's inappropriate for opening prayers at Congress or for the President of the United States to offer prayers in public speeches.
 
Last edited:
Fritzdorf said:
However, someone on the sports club committee likes to start the Christmas dinner by getting everyone to stand up and pray. I want to object to this, but don't know the best way to do this politely and effectively.
Click to expand...

Just tell him that you'd rather not cater to the superstitions of the savages.
 
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