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Bus stop lady

LibraryLady

Emeritus
Joined
Sep 4, 2004
Messages
14,331
Location
Maryland
We see all kinds inside the library and out.

Outside of our library, at the corner of Cathedral and Mulberry Streets, there’s a bus shelter, one of those Plexiglas and metal three sided enclosures to protect people from the elements while they wait for the bus. A couple of years ago, a woman took up residence there.

At first she was very domestic. I saw her spraying the glass with an empty Windex bottle, and wiping it down with newspaper. She began to put pictures up with tape and decorated the bench with cushions made of rags and stuffed with newspaper. And every morning, city workers would take down the pictures and remove the cushions while she was at breakfast at Our Sisters Place across the street. This went on for a while, but she finally took the hint and gave up on the homely touches.

But there she would sit unless the weather got too cold or stormy, and she would sit in the library coffee shop. She was an expert at cadging smokes and I would see her sitting on her bench, which is carefully constructed to prevent anyone from lying down. She’d puff on her cigarette and have long, animated, and somewhat profane arguments with a friend that only she could see. She dressed a bit like Moms Mabley, and carried the requisite bags of precious refuse always with her.

The library maintenance crew starts their shift at 4am. This morning they found her, sitting on her bench, cigarette in hand, having died during the night.

I am sad that she died there alone, and I’m angry that a large, rich, and powerful country cannot take care of its mentally ill citizens. But I’m also a little glad she died at home.
 
What did she die of? (as if you'll ever know).

Exposure is one thing, heart attack or cancer wouldn't have much to do with care of the mental patient.

Other than that, it's called 'civil rights'. The mentally ill have as much right to live on the streets as the mentally stable do. That is, unless they are a "threat to themselves or others". Which is hard to argue when the only threat is of exposure.
 
i think it's a bit presumptive to assume she was just cast aside. There's no way of knowing without digging into her personal history. She could have been under care and chose to leave. She could have been deemed "good enough" as there was overcrowding. She could have had tons of money in a bank account and her illness lead her to bag lady status.

There just so many things it could have been, from terrible bureaucratic ignorance or apathy, to a decision she chose to make.....
 
That said, and no disrespect to the dead, but civilised society hovers over very many boundaries. To save your...I was going to say 'friend', but she wasn't, you didn't befriend her, you just observed her. To save your specimen society would need to establish that it stood some distance on the other side of the boundary that holds the state back from enforcing behaviours. Oh it edges in now and again, smoking bans, murder laws etc, but on the whole we've defined civilisation as something that errs occasionally for the benefit of the majority. We enforce ourselves on the differently mental when, as casebro says, they are a threat to themselves or others. Meanwhile, if they live and die in a bus stop, so be it.
 
I am sad that she died there alone, and I’m angry that a large, rich, and powerful country cannot take care of its mentally ill citizens.

As I recall, people who suffer from psychotic symptom are the least likely to be compliant with a treatment plan, especially consistent medication usage, since they are usually the ones that have the largest deficits in executive functioning. Thus, blaming "the system" for not taking care of the mentally doesn't necessarily address the fact that deinstitutionalization has affected the ability of for "the system" to care for the most vulnerable of the mentally ill.
 
I'm sorry, I'm honestly not sure what your point is. Are you saying she had a choice?
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I encountered a young woman who was living in the bus stop nearby. Eating thawed tv dinners... I asked her if she was OK, and she said she was. After a couple of days I called the city, and they said they'd send a car around to talk to her, and inform her of the Woman's Shelter.
She was gone that evening.
 
LL,

Very touching story. And I absolutely agree.

We had a lady in my hometown growing up that would wander throughout town, with shopping bags full of stuff. But, they were not Wal-Mart bags, they were the high end stores like Macy's and Neiman Markus, Tommy Hilfiger, etc.

Nobody knew whom she was talking to, and was rumored to be wealthy. Like, LOADED, filthy rich kinda wealthy.

Well, this went on for years, i'd see her all over town. Sometimes in the downtown historic district, sometimes in the commercial districts, just walking around joyfully talking to her friend.

Then in the newspaper was a writeup about a pedestrian whom was killed by a passing motorist, and it was her.

Turns out, inside the bags was very high end clothes, and about $75,000!! But, she had no idea what she had in the bags, and had no relatives. Sad really. Never bothered anyone, never caused any commotion, but obviously mentally ill.

Sad. People like that need help, and we just don't fund those types of community programs like we should.

Never did find out her name.
 
I knew a "bus stop lady" once.

Only it was a guy, and he didn't live at a bus stop, he kind of lived behind a Publix supermarket next to my apartment in Florida. He used to bum cigarettes all the time, and when I got Chinese take out, I'd get him a box of fried rice or some egg rolls. I actually got to know him, and on more than one occasion, tried to get him to go to a homeless shelter. He didn't want anything to do with the idea. As far as I could tell, he was mentally competent. He would do odd jobs from time to time for a little cash, didn't really get rip-roaring drunk (we would drink a beer or two every now and then) and wasn't on any kind of dope, to my knowledge.

In think he probably could have gotten a job and been a "normal" citizen, if he'd wanted to. He just had something in his brain that kept him from doing it.

He got beaten to death by a couple of thugs one night. Heaven only knows why; poor S.O.B. didn't have a damn thing worth stealing.
 
Perfectly normal people have been known to check out of society and societal norms, because they cannot stand how they'd have to live.

I have to have a job doing work I hate, that I have to go to every single day, in order to pay rent on an ugly apartment in a place I don't like, with rude, obnoxious neighbors I can't stand and who won't be quiet, and my kids have simply moved on in life and abandoned me, and I hate the clothes I'm forced to wear to be seen as "productive" and "normal," and all I want now is to get away from you sick, demented psychos and live...hell, I'll live in the park, if I have to, but I hate what society says is the way I have to live AND that they think if I live like this, I am obligated to be happy about it!

kind of thing....



(Yes, I realize this doesn't or probably doesn't describe bus stop lady. I'm only saying, it doesn't take actual mental illness to prefer living in the park, working the occasional odd job, bumming a smoke now and then, and actually being freaking HAPPY. I'm about there, myself, to be honest.)
 
I heard a radio show one morning where they were interviewing a woman who advocated medicating the mentally ill against their will. The radio host was aghast that anyone could consider such an egregious violation of free will, but she assured him that the issue wasn't as black and white as it seemed. Many mentally ill may very well choose medication if they were in their right minds, but they are, by definition, not in their right minds. If the first thing an illness disables is the discretion to allow you to choose whether to take medication for your illness...well, it's rather difficult to treat.
 
(Yes, I realize this doesn't or probably doesn't describe bus stop lady. I'm only saying, it doesn't take actual mental illness to prefer living in the park, working the occasional odd job, bumming a smoke now and then, and actually being freaking HAPPY. I'm about there, myself, to be honest.)


*hands slingblade a pack of Camel Lights and an egg roll*
 
Heartbreaking, but not surprising. People have become disposable in this society.

That reminds me of a story I read a few months ago. Maybe someone mentioned it on here too. A guy killed himself in his house and four years passed before anyone even realized he was gone. He wasn't discovered until they authorities went to foreclose on him for unpaid taxes. This is one of the saddest stories I've ever seen.

http://www.hlntv.com/article/2012/02/07/man-discovered-dead-home-four-years-after-his-death
 

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