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Banana > Atheist

senorpogo

Master Poster
senorpogo
Joined
Mar 18, 2006
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Banana's are the atheist's nightmare! It's true! Ask Kirk Cameron, star of TV's "Growing Pain".

(Sorry if this has been posted before.)

Voltaire mocked this argument with the character Pangloss from his work "Candide" all the freaking way back in 1759!

"It is demonstrable," said he, "that things cannot be otherwise than as they are; for as all things have been created for some end, they must necessarily be created for the best end. Observe, for instance, the nose is formed for spectacles, therefore we wear spectacles. The legs are visibly designed for stockings, accordingly we wear stockings. Stones were made to be hewn and to construct castles, therefore My Lord has a magnificent castle; for the greatest baron in the province ought to be the best lodged. Swine were intended to be eaten, therefore we eat pork all the year round: and they, who assert that everything is right, do not express themselves correctly; they should say that everything is best."
 
I'm an atheist, and bananas don't terrify me. In fact, I eat bananas for breakfast. Sometimes. I did yesterday.
 
Which is designed for which? The nose for the spectacle, or the spectacle for the nose? The puddle for the hole or the hole for the puddle? (DNAdams)

"Observe, for instance, the nose is formed for spectacles, therefore we wear spectacles. "

Of course... We use belts to hold our trousers up because some of us don't have, errr, noses that big enough.



Or from the comments:
"Okay, Mr. smarty pants atheist, and how come steaks are just the right size for dinner plates? Huh? And what about coconuts? Why do they come all shredded and ready to sprinkle on cakes?"
 
Y'know, I read and hear a lot of the things Kirk Cameron likes to say about atheists, and I wonder: Does he ever realize what a twat he comes across as? :boggled:
 
I've heard Kirk Cameron's banana argument before. If he were only to attempt to shove a pineapple instead of a banana up his rule-8, he would see the speciousness of his argument.
 
FireGarden said:
"Observe, for instance, the nose is formed for spectacles, therefore we wear spectacles. "
Click to expand...

In case there's any doubt about Voltaire's assessment of this view, keep in mind that Dr Pangloss loses his nose to syphilis in the book.
 
I’ve heard it said that monkeys (and I know for a fact that people w/hand injuries) open bananas from the other end -- it’s substantially easier. I suppose that would make the tab God created for opening it actually a handle God made for holding it.

But the real question is how long will it take for the Banana Splits to be canonized?

:Banane48:
 
Yes, the nose is designed for spectacles, and the eyes are designed for- aw crap!
 
It's not crap at all, c4ts!

1. Spectacles are intelligently designed
2. God made our vision blurry so that the nose would at last have a function
3. Therefore.... God exists.
 
Didn't mankind diddle with bananas like we did wheat, corn, barley and many other food stuffs? IIRC, the origional banana is a little, green, tough-skinned little fruit that isn't all that palatable.

[Dennis Miller]However, I could be wrong[/DM]
 
Ryan O'Dine said:
I’ve heard it said that monkeys (and I know for a fact that people w/hand injuries) open bananas from the other end -- it’s substantially easier. I suppose that would make the tab God created for opening it actually a handle God made for holding it.
Click to expand...

I just got back from the grocery store, and tried eating a banana like that. It was difficult to open at the other end. Couldn't just stick a thumbnail in, then peel. After a lot of work, I wound up with a separated chunk of peel and thoroughly smushed the end of the banana. Maybe it's just me, but the traditional stem-first method seems a easier.
 
TragicMonkey said:
I just got back from the grocery store, and tried eating a banana like that. It was difficult to open at the other end. Couldn't just stick a thumbnail in, then peel. After a lot of work, I wound up with a separated chunk of peel and thoroughly smushed the end of the banana. Maybe it's just me, but the traditional stem-first method seems a easier.
Click to expand...
I said monkeys do it that way, not Tragic monkeys. :rolleyes:

Seriously, though, I have a hand injury and can only open them comfortably from the other end. I guess you have to get the hang of it.

Or maybe I’m just ridiculously talented.
 
TragicMonkey said:
I just got back from the grocery store, and tried eating a banana like that. It was difficult to open at the other end. Couldn't just stick a thumbnail in, then peel. After a lot of work, I wound up with a separated chunk of peel and thoroughly smushed the end of the banana. Maybe it's just me, but the traditional stem-first method seems a easier.
Click to expand...

I have precisely the opposite experience... by tugging on the stem, it smushes the top of the banana before it breaks.

Approaching from the other end, I have the added advantage of the black gunky pit pulling away with the top.
 
I thought you were just supposed to squeeze them out like all the cartoon monkeys do.

If you can't trust Disney's Jungle Book, who can you trust?
 
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